Question!

Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, not small, but valuable. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void.

I mean it

I've always known that you're gonna go far. We're gonna shine in two different directions. It's okay, even though it's not always the case for me. I'm sincerely happy for you :)

Reflection on my life

Outside the station, she stands with her child on the side of the street, taking pictures of cars.

You think she’s insane. Until, one day, you notice that she’s taking pictures of the license plates of the cars her child gets into.

Because you look. But you do not see.

And she walks out the shop with bags full of cat food. You think she’s some crazy cat lady until you find out, she has no cats.

Because you eat. But you do not taste.

It’s been a while since their last album but he assures you, he’s doing just fine these days, white flecks in his nostrils. Then he asks you if he can spend the night on your couch, even though it stinks.

Because you sniff. But you do not smell.

And they say “Just OK” when you ask them how school was. Then you wonder what they’re hiding until you find their diary and the last entry reads “I wish you’d give me some privacy.”

Because you listen. But you do not hear.

And they’ve got a bruise over their eye and you run the tips of your fingers over it and ask them how it happened. You believe them. Until it happens again.

Because you touch. But you do not feel.

And they walk past you everyday, one million stories, each waiting to be told. Waiting for you to ask.

Because you live. But very few, love.

You're not allowed to read this.

I remember studying

in my room, just reading,

and shutting the book,

looking up, and missing you, missing you,

and reading the notes again.

There’s no freedom in it or in fear: my heart’s not mine.

Haves and Have-Nots

I’m so terribly confused.

When I have love, I envy those without the heartbreak that comes with it. When I do not have love, I covet those who are lucky enough to find it.

Lol at me?

Happiness.

- finding your musical soul mates
- when he smiles at you
- spinning around in the rain
- unexpected texts
- finding something you thought you'd lost
- feeling pretty
- winning an argument
- getting letters in the mail
- noticing something you never had
- slipping on your new pair of shoes
- cheering someone up
- knowing that everything will be okay

You have a pen? Take a memo and Write this down:

Once, I was loved, supremely with every fiber of someone’s being. He was the risk I'd always take. He just never knew how to hold my heart.

Yet, he's my favorite thought.

if YDK what IDKWTM means then IDEK where to start‏

November 24, 2010

I wonder where you are right now and what you are doing. I wonder what you are thinking about or if you are even awake. I wonder what you are feeling when you hear that one song. Yes, the song has done. I wonder about you sometimes.